The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

I'm the kind of person who can read a book in a day. I usually read whatever book I'm working on in a day.

This book was no exception, but it came close to being overwhelming. If it were any longer, I would have had to force myself to stop reading and take a moment to process everything like I had to do with Brandon Sanderson's Oathbringer.

So backstory time, I saw this book on the shelf at Barnes and Noble a while ago. I went home, put it on hold, and have been waiting for it since then. I picked it up from the library a few days ago.

When there are things I'm hesitant to read because I'm unsure what to expect, I let it sit. This was one of those books. An author I'd never heard of, subject matter I'd barely touched on... I didn't know what to expect.

So it sat on my shelf for couple days. I haven't read anything else during that time (besides my textbook because, y'know, school is a thing) because I'd made up my mind that it was going to be the next book I read. It needed to go back to the library because there are like a billion other holds on it or something. So yeah, can't renew it, gotta read it ASAP.

I finally grabbed it today and went to read it over lunch. I kinda forgot to eat for an hour.

This book made me think in the way that books are supposed to. It challenged things, brought concepts to life, made things REAL.

I mean, I literally just read THE chapter in my MEDIA textbook about racism and reporting on people of color. The Single Chapter, guys. (I think Starr rubbed off on me a little bit -- I want to swear a little bit because sometimes capital letters just don't cut it)

It took the words from the textbook about being careful, about the rules and ethics and #TheWayIt'sSupposedToBe of media and races and genders and issues that usually mean speaking in the tongues of political correctness (which my terrible memory DOES NOT HELP WITH (so if I offend somebody, I'm sorry -- it wasn't on purpose)) and made it real. Showed what's actually happening. Showed that it's wrong.

Just Sunday, I was talking with my best friend about not fitting in. Anywhere. We're both Asian-American and look the part, although she's half and I'm full. We're also homeschooled.

We. Don't. Fit.

We weren't made fun of, but that doesn't make you feel any better for not being white, for not going to public school, for not fitting in.

Maybe that's why this book spoke so powerfully to me. Starr doesn't fit. That was where I could relate most deeply to the character. I don't know where that point hit for others, but that's where it was for me.

I know my experience is nowhere NEAR Starr's, or any African-American's, really. But I could understand, a little bit. And because stories are like that, I could connect with the character and experience it in significantly less detail.

It all sounds stupid and trite, I know, but I guess I just wanted to spazz about it because I know I won't be forgetting this book for a long time.

It takes words and concepts that I've known for a while and makes me live it. It's not asking for pity, it's asking for people to come walk alongside.

At least, that's what I think. Maybe I'm wrong (in which case, I apologize. Please correct me).

But at the very least, this book has made me think.

It's made me realize that I cannot look away from this. I went to Urbana 2015 and was challenged to not look away when things are difficult to look at. I admit I look away when things are hard to look at. I can't watch 9/11 videos. They're too difficult to watch.

I've been looking away from the situation. I still think there's a lot of crap, but there's a lot of crap that goes on everywhere. I can't just look at the crap and judge the entire situation from that.

If I want to be seen as a person, I have to look at people as persons. I have to see the people in and around the situation.

They're not numbers, they're not statistics.

They're lives.

They matter.

I can't look away from lives. Especially when there are lives that don't have to end.

When there are lives that shouldn't have ended.

They're more than the statistics. More than the movements.

They're lives and they matter.

More Sanderson Rambling

Just really quick

I adore the Stormlight Archives
so if you haven't read it
and don't want it spoiled

TURN BACK NOW

Kay?

Cool.

(you didn't think I adored just the big three, did you?)

Okay but as of this point in time (Oathbringer) Kaladin Stormblessed is my favorite character because of his growth, particularly in Words of Radiance (which we now own because my sister and I both adore it and we agreed to work together and buy it).

Because he goes from considering suicide to his oaths. His third oath in particular blew me away.

"I will protect even those I hate, so long as it is right." -Words of Radiance 

Dalinar's arc (particularly in Oathbringer) made me cry.
As a reader, I haven't spent a lot of time with Adolin and I respect him (way more than I did when I first met him) but I feel like I don't quite know him as well.
Jasnah spent most of Words of Radiance being dead, so I don't really know her either, but her twist at the end of Oathbringer is *incoherent screeching*
Shallan has what's probably the most tragic backstory out of all of them and I like where her character is going.

But Kaladin Stormblessed...

He does things because he cannot look away.

Because he keeps running.
not running in a bad way, it's more he keeps going but im also going off a quote (remember that quote last post about running? That's about Fleet and it's about a race, and it's about not stopping -- not giving up)

Obviously my life is nowhere near as hard and the decisions I make are not nearly as life threatening.

But I can relate to Kaladin and how he deals with the consequences of his decision. And his ongoing depression. His inability to look away. To not do anything.

And so, I hope to do as he does and pick up. There'll be not good moments in life.
I'll never be perfect.
I'll be exhausted and done and just SO DONE.
But I don't want to give up.

I want to be able to keep running.

Life before death, strength before weakness, journey before destination.

The first ideal, the first of the immortal words.

Life will be hard and it's going to suck.

But I can keep running to the best of my ability.

Life before Death, Strength before Weakness, Journey before Destination

For glory lit, and life alive, for goals unreached and aims to strive. All men must try, the wind did see. It is the test, it is the dream.

-Wit (Words of Radiance)

Brandon Sanderson. I mentioned him in an earlier post.

I don't care if you hate him, I like his works and I'm going to spaz about them because I apparently don't do that enough with my friends.

Four (maybe five?) years ago, I didn't have a clue who Brandon Sanderson was.
It was a blissful time...

Who am I kidding?

I was road tripping to the OYAN summer workshop and reunion (I really do not remember what year it was) with my best friend and she read Alcatraz Smedry vs. the Scrivner's Bones (Alcatraz book 2) aloud to the car.

 Yeah, yeah, I know we started in the middle I'M SORRY IT'S NOT TECHNICALLY MY FAULT OKAY.

While Alcatraz is possibly not the best introduction to Brandon Sanderson (as Alcatraz is possibly one of the most ridiculous series I've ever read (but it's AWESOME okay)), it was a good introduction.

My sister and I were quick to finish the series (as it stood. Book 5 FINALLY came out two years ago).

By then, one of our friends had started reading Sanderson's other books and was praising them (and also nagging us to read them).

It took a while for us to get around to it. (I made the mistake of trying to read Elantris -- my sister read it and enjoyed it, but was surprised by how long it took to get anywhere and on the whole we were not overly impressed)

We finally picked up Sanderson's Reckoner's Trilogy. That was the beginning of the end.

We sped read that thing.
It was on to the Rithmatist.

Also a good read (because geez it's Brandon Sanderson get with the program).

I lose track of what exactly my sister read after that. I was much slower, more interested in Terry Pratchett (and also SCHOOL).

Plus, I tried to start Way of Kings twice and never got very far with it.

I thought it was the most boring thing I'd ever attempted to read.

I was left wondering why do people even like these books?

I did finally get around to reading Elantris. That helped, since it's a bit shorter but also takes forever to pick up (like Way of Kings does).

I also finally read Mistborn, but that starts out much faster and with more intensity than Way of Kings.
Yeah, I really didn't like that book.
At first.

Anyway, so fast forward to this year, when my closest friends are like: OH MY GOSH STORMLIGHT THREE IS COMING OUT *SPAZ* and I'm just in the corner like um, great guys, happy for you??

I wasn't necessarily impressed.

And then Oathbringer came out in October and my nagging friend bought it and everyone spazzed some more. My sister reread the series and I read bits over her shoulder (because that's just what I do, okay?).

I realized that the series was actually interesting.

That Way of Kings got more action-y. That I could actually care about the characters.

So around Thanksgiving, I picked up my phone and tried again (okay, but seriously have you seen how thick the book is, it's a freaking les mis and it's terrifying).

It took me three weeks to finish it (that's balancing it with school).
What most impresses me about that is that I remembered the characters.

I'm a quick reader, which is good because my mind doesn't retain names well. If a plot point or character isn't interesting, I will forget it. Not purposefully, it just doesn't stick.

I remember most of what happened in Way of Kings.

Obviously, it's a good book.

But I remember it. That makes it an excellent book (in my opinion).

And then I sped-read Words of Radiance (#2), Edgedancer (#2.5), and Oathbringer (#3) (because I'm a terrible person like that and don't care about my emotional well-being, apparently). (Also Warbreaker while I was waiting for Oathbringer, but that's not related to Stormlight)

I finished Oathbringer on Christmas Day.

I won't spoil anything, but it's really good. While Words of Radiance is probably my favorite out of Stormlight so far, I love the end to Oathbringer.

There are no words for it.

I suspect this is one of the rare series that I will enjoy rereading.

20/10 would recommend Brandon Sanderson in general. Would highly recommend Stormlight (but maybe not as an introduction to him, unless you make it a habit to read high fantasy novels not found in the YA section)

I'm off to finish the Mistborn Trilogy (and then finish the next one).








P. S. Did you see what I did?

*runs away cackling like a maniac*

It's Been a While

But hey, happy new year!

One of my friends recently (like two months ago) posted about how she wasn't going to stop blogging even though it was hard. Even though she had nothing profound to share. (find it here (and then stay and read more because it's a really good blog)) Obviously that motivated me. A lot. (not really but hey, whatever)

That aside, I'm back because I finally got on the computer for non-writing, non-school purposes and figured I should do something about my blog.

As a catch-up, I did Inktober (with gel pens because I'm lame like that) and it was awesome. I had a lot of fun trying to think of things to draw each day. I mostly stuck with the prompt list, but I'm pretty happy with some of the variations I did (some of those variations turned into Christmas presents, so it was a win-win).

Then it was on to November and the dreaded NaNoWriMo (national novel writing month, for those of you who don't live under rocks and give up social life for the month of november). I actually not only hit the word count, but finished a novel (!!!!!!!!) In the past, I've finished a novel (under the word count) and hit the word count (without getting close to finishing the stupid thing) so that was a really big achievement. I also managed to balance NaNo with schoolwork (I don't even know, don't ask me) and finished one of my last few courses.

December was actually relaxing, if emotionally traumatizing. By the time we got to Thanksgiving, I was kind of in the home stretch. It was all or nothing. So I decided to start reading Way of Kings by the fabulous Brandon Sanderson. More on that in probably the next blog post. I finished up two courses and attempted to low-key chill until Christmas.

It mostly worked.

Until I remembered that Christmas was a week away and I hadn't actually finished a number of Christmas presents.

Don't procrastinate on Christmas presents.

Anyway, that brings us to now.

As I'm looking ahead to 2018, my hope of graduating college this year is approaching achievable. This brings with it a whole host of exciting things (and a whole lot of trepidation). I have three courses to complete and then my final thesis (which may see some development through blog posts since I have no idea what I'm going to do for it O_O). Then I'm done.

I mean.

Like. Done. Done done done done done done.
Finished with school.

Then it's on to find a job.

I don't know what 2018 holds for me, but I'm excited to see. And terrified. But for the time being, just excited.

Librarians

When people say the word librarian, I just kind of blank out. It's just a nice blank white space.

Because I think of different librarians in different contexts. Outside of those contexts, I don't know which to think about. I like both, to a certain extent. Neither of them really jump to the forefront of my mind.

Words have power, but sometimes there's just so much that comes to mind that I blank out.

Iko Kasahara from Library Wars: Love & War is a librarian. Of a sort.

its so pretty @_@

I love the story (this is one of the few series where I want to buy all the books and make myself go broke -- like FMA). I tend to think of Kasaraha because she's the protagonist in the series and the premise of the series is intriguing. It stuck.


I also tend to think of Shasta Smedry from the Alcatraz and the Evil Librarians series.

Shasta's the grumpy woman on the right.

...yeah, that doesn't exactly help my perception of librarians.

Not all librarians are evil. But most of them are. And Brandon Sanderson does an excellent job portraying them as such.


Obviously, these are fictionalized librarians, but they still affect my perception of librarians. Are they good, willing to do anything to protect the freedom to read? Or are they evil, controlling the information that we're given?
What do you think?

The Perfect Word

I am a writer.

I'm not a very good one, but I am a writer. And as a writer, something that intrigues me is the fact that some of the concepts in journalism are so essential to fiction, yet those concepts are often overlooked.
Most importantly, the idea of using specific words in the perfect arrangement.

The most valuable of all talents is that of
never using two words when
one will do. -Thomas Jefferson

I've heard this quote before and I've seen examples of the concept in fiction (a series that is highly praised for its use of this exact idea is Maggie Stiefvater's Raven Cycle) but it never truly struck me how important it is for a storyteller to do this.

Of course, importance usually makes it harder. In fact, it is often painfully hard to write prettily (not necessarily concisely).

I have made this letter longer than usual,
only because I have not had the time
to make it shorter -Blaise Pascal

It takes way more effort to choose specific words than to just let everything flow out.

I'm a spewer. I just type what's on my mind. It's much harder for me to choose which words capture what I want to say in a more precise manner.

This is essential to a journalist so that they don't risk offending people and losing their position. It's also important to (at least in theory) use specific language to keep from showing specific bias.

It's also essential to a writer. Words convey emotion, whether anybody realizes that or not. When setting a scene, brilliant blue describes a completely different emotion from soft blue.

Words are important and it matters which ones you use.

Choose the perfect word. Don't settle for less. Your writing will benefit from it.

Dear People

Dear People who Tell me About TV Shows I Should Watch,

Please stop. I have mentioned this before to you, but I do have other things in my life. Like school. And creating visuals for you.
You clearly do not understand that I have a commitment to books first. Books have been and always will be my first love. That being said, I have taken the time to create a visual that you should refer back to before recommending a new TV show to me.

Do you see that smaller stack of books? That's my schoolwork, not including the current textbooks and etc. I have on Kindle/various other electronic sources. That large stack of books is all the books I want to read for fun before the year is over.
I do enjoy TV shows.
But not right now.
So please, for the sake of my sanity and those around me, stop recommending shows to me.