Happy New Year!

I suppose that's a little bit late, considering we're now all of five days into the new year. But five days off isn't bad.

Well, it's not too bad.

...

Okay, yeah. I guess that's kinda bad.

I am, unfortunately, a procrastinator.

source

There are different kinds of procrastinators. (a field guide to understanding the procrastinators in your life)

I am, also unfortunately, all of them, which makes me very good at not doing things that I don't want to do.

Part of the reason I tend to put things off until later is because I dislike change. Most people don't realize this because I am pretty spontaneous and impulsive, but I really don't like things that I'm not familiar with. I don't like situations where I can't predict the outcome, or where things don't go as I had initially planned.

This makes me hard to work with, unless I talk myself into a mindset of flexibility (which actually happens quite a bit -- just throwing that out there).

In fact, dislike is a very weak word to describe how I feel about change. I abhor it. I despise it. I see change coming and I run in the other direction. (I was trying to think of a word stronger than run but couldn't come up with anything >.<)

But change is a good thing, right?

I mean, without change, we would never get anywhere. Society would be in stasis and who knows where we'd be. Probably still in the stone age.

Since we're not, since society changed, I'm going to finish this post instead of painting on a cave wall and grunting. (Caveman stereotypes are a beautiful.)

Change is good and I get that, but for me, it's terrifying.

I'm working on my bachelor's degree, but if I work hard enough, I'll be done by the end of this year.
Pros to finishing this year:
I'll be done with education, at least for a little while (I have no plans to jump straight into grad school -- I want a break from homework and studies and ugh)
I won't be a humongous financial burden on my parents anymore (even just paying for tuition is HORRENDOUS)
I'LL BE FREE
Cons to finishing this year:
I have no job
I have no way of supporting myself
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IM DOING WITH MY LIFE

(is there maybe an Elizabeth Swann I could borrow? somebody to help me find some direction?)

I suspect this is the reason I've been procrastinating with school recently. For YEARS my only objective has been to finish school. Sign up for the course, finish the course. That was all, nothing really beyond that.

I know what my general objective is -- to earn a degree in Communications (and hopefully double major in English) so that I cover all my possible areas of interest in one broad sweep.

But beyond that, I have NO CLUE what I'm doing.

That's the kind of change that terrifies me the most.

It is a happy new year (despite what this may seem like) and I'm glad to have made it to 2017.

I'm just not sure where to go from here.